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< Back Kathleen Becker's Story Kathleen describes her path to becoming a speech pathologist. She describes her experience growing up with her younger sister Margaret Mary who was born with cerebral palsy. As a child she tried to find ways to help her sister learn to speak. Later, she took her first speech pathology course in college, and went on to work in a private practice and at an elementary school. 00:00 / 04:49 I feel lucky in the way I found speech and language pathology, because I certainly didn't know anything about it when I was growing up. But how I got into it started with my sister. And when she was born, she sort of changed our family because she was born very, very disabled. She had very severe Cerebral Palsy. And there were no services available for people with disabilities then unless you were paying for it privately. And our family was working class and they had seven kids and they really didn't have any money. And it really changed my family. I mean, my mother became very depressed and my father started drinking more than he had even been drinking before. And it was devastating to the family. And so first being raised Catholic and being very fervent, I would sprinkle holy water on her. I would pray to God all the time. I would make deals with God. That if like, he would get one of her legs working, it would be okay if one of my legs didn't work. She was very, very disabled. She never learned how to walk or talk or could feed herself. She was basically like an infant. So I set about trying to teach my sister how to talk. And one day I had gotten her propped up in such a way and I had practiced enough with her that I told her that I was gonna call my mother in. And that when Mom came in, that then I wanted her to say ‘hi’, which is what I had taught her to say. And my mom walked in the room and now you're thinking like my mom's kind of depressed already to begin with. And she walks in the room and I say to her, I say to Margaret, say ‘hi’ to mom. And Margaret does. She says, ‘ah-hi’, which is how you say hi when you inhale. And I thought it was really cool that I had taught her how to say hi, but my mother just turned around and walked out of the room and never said anything about it. And that was pretty devastating to me because I just really didn't understand why my mom didn't think that this was really great, like, look, she can do this. My first job that I went to was in a very impoverished area called the Northeast Kingdom. And I worked there with preschoolers. And I met my first child who didn’t speak at all. And I was really confronted with the fears that I had from when I tried to teach my sister who couldn't talk at all. It's called the Northeast Kingdom. And I worked there with this boy. And he just understood everything I said to him. He should have been able to talk, but he just, anything I tried, he just looked at me and shook his head, no. He wasn't gonna do it. So one day I was like in such a panic, he came to the clinic and I just forgot everything that I learned in graduate school about how you're supposed to be a professional. And I just remembered my sister and that when I would play with her, I would just do things that she really liked the best. And so I just, I picked him up, I took him, I put him in my car and I drove to a horse stable where there was a baby horse there. And his mother had told me he liked baby animals. And when we got ready to leave the stable, he ran up to the horses and I heard him speak. I heard him say, ‘bye bye, horsey.’ And so when the next day he came into the clinic, I had gotten some new books, some Sesame Street books that I knew he liked Sesame Street. And he climbed in my lap and I, you know, I was basically, you know, he's pointing to the books and I'm like, yeah, David, I know, I know, I know you like Sesame Street, but it was so much fun with you at the stable yesterday. And I heard you talk to the horses. I heard you say bye-bye to the horses. So now that I know that you really can talk, I want you to tell me who this is. And he just looked at me and he said, oh, that's Ernie. And after that, he opened page after page of the book and he did have problems speaking. He sounded funny when he spoke. And it's because he had what's called the repaired cleft palate, which is a hole in the roof of your mouth, but it had been repaired when he was a baby. And so he knew that he sounded different and we would spend, you know, many months working on making his speech better. But that initial when I got to be the person who got to hear him speak first, just like I got to hear my sister speak first, that one word. Previous Next

< Back Charlie's Story Charlie recounts his rich experience traveling the world, and what he has learned from a lifetime of travel. He discusses the importance of how traveling helps us experience and help better understand other cultures, and how the individuals of these cultures shape his experiences. Scroll to listen 00:00 / 04:58 So to start out, I wanted to ask you to tell me about your travels throughout your life. Oh, totally I've been we've been very lucky with the chances to travel widely and a number of ways. We've traveled in Europe and Southeast Asia, Australia, New Zealand. And we traveled by boat and we travel by plane to some places that folks don't likely get to. So we've been very lucky. What what we started doing was bareboat chartering. And so we go down with friends and charter a boat for a week and poke around. And then we got to know some folks down there. And that led to a number of trips that took us to quiet little places that were very special. Yeah, what places did you end up visiting? Well, the some of the most interesting those days were in the Bahamas, which is not far from Florida. The Bahamas, or that's an earring because that a lifestyle is a very simple one and tied closely to the water. So people fish and people say, Oh, it's a much less complicated life.Each culture has its own defining food preferences, but so it becomes a question of which your pleasure artists are buried. So when you hurt Italy, I remember, we literally he took us out into the countryside of his place, and we'll probably had five or six courses. And in between each course, there was a different pasta dish. So oh, you could Oh, the pasta, trouble. And other cultures that fish can be defining, particularly in the islands where the fresher, fresh and wonderful. And and then of course, there's always the wind to wash it down with that makes that compliments of me also. It's all fun. Some of the places that we went to, as I say, we traveled around the world. And it's you, you realize when you travel that, wow, the architecture and the historic ask aspects are interesting. It's the people that make the difference. And so we'd always try and somehow connect with local folks wherever we were. And that made it especially nice. It was interesting because you can read forever about different cultures but until you talk to the people, while you're there isn't really illuminated and and so the people flesh out the sense you have the culture. So I know that it is it's clear that you've had a lot of time spent traveling and going throughout different places in the world. I definitely want to be able to travel more in my future and so I was curious if you had any advice for me for my future travels. The only advice I would give as a general advice that remember that traveling in my view is about the opportunity to meet people and focus on people lose much this the charm with the area and look food and all the reasons that it's appealing. Previous Next

< Back Joan's Story Joan shares the story of adopting her daughter from Russia. She talks about what adoption is like and some of the struggles that come with adoption. Scroll to listen 00:00 / 03:31 I’m Joan Oleck, and my daughter whom I adopted in 1996 in Russia is now 26 years old. I ended up adopting Anya through an agency in Russia that had a connection with Spence-Chapin back in New York where I was living, and that connection was open to single women adopting which was still kind of unusual back then. So, I jumped on it. My grandparents had emigrated from Russia, what was then Russia in the nineteenth century and I had always loved Russian culture so it was a good fit for me. I passed all of the screenings I had to do. In October of 96, I traveled to Russia with another couple who were also adopting from the same orphanage. I got a tiny little baby, just five pounds, very undernourished and I named her Anya. And on the car ride back, 200 miles back to Moscow, she was on my lap, somehow I picked up on the fact that she wanted to look out the window. So I picked her up and held her against the window, and she, you know, quieted down and that was a very sweet moment. We were passing a lot of birch trees and a lot of American towels that people hung in their yards to sell for some reason. Anyway, that week will stay in my memory forever. Ali: What is something that you wish more people knew about adoption? Joan: That aside from the genetic issues, because sometimes, you know you need to see if you can match on a kidney or stem cells or whatever. That aside from that, that child is as much yours as if you had given birth to her or him. And I just really want people to understand that. You know when Anya was a little kid, kids would come up to her and say, “Well who’s your real mom?” and she’d go “Joan is my real Mom, that’s the only Mom I’ve ever had”, even though she and I were in touch with her birth family and exchanged letters for several years. I want people to know that these children have feelings. I, on the other hand, told Anya as soon as she could understand “you are from a country called Russia, here it is on the map”, and everytime Anya heard Russia on the news, she’d go “Mommy! They just said "Russia, where I’m from!”, and she was always very comfortable with it as a result. I was very fortunate to be adopting at a time when single women were slowly being accepted as adopted parents, and the same thing was happening with gay couples. At the time being 97’ 98’, I wrote a widely disseminated piece for a platform called Solan, and it won a national award, just interviewing singles and gay couples who were adopting, and just about the discrimination against them. To this day, it still remains that some church groups in Southern states block gay couples from adopting which is terrible because a loving family of any kind is what any child needs. It doesn't really matter what kind of family. If there’s love, there’s love. Previous Next

< Back Makeda's Story 00:00 / 04:53 Previous Next

< Back Olivia's Story Listen to hear Olivia share her experience taking a gap year after highschool and traveling overseas with a program called ARCC Gap Year. 00:00 / 03:18 I had the idea in my junior year of high school. I didn't know what I was interested in. I mean, for a lot of people, I felt like they knew that they wanted to go to college. And I had another idea that I didn't know was another path for me. And so I thought of taking a gap year and not continuing my education right after high school. I really wanted to go to Thailand. I feel like something just sparked it in me. Second semester of my gap year, I went in the beginning of the pandemic. So I went with a program called ARCC Gap Year, and I went with a group and yeah, it was an amazing experience. I do have a special needs sister that makes it kind of challenging to travel. So I never went on really extravagant. vacations. I've only kind of stuck around like the New England area when we travel as a family. And so I think this was a big step for me being away from my family for the first time. And I think it was like the first ever like brave act that I've ever done in my life, especially at like a young age, I think I was 19. You kind of like put a lot of trust in yourself when you're traveling too. And like, since I went with a group, relying on those people that you're traveling with. I did have challenges with health problems a little bit so being able to speak your needs to the group and making sure that you're well, and you're taken into account for. I think I always knew that I wanted to do something that helped people in a way. But I didn't know exactly how I wanted that to look for me. When I went overseas, it translated there too. When I was in a different culture, being with a group especially, I found my sense of community with them and being able to trust them too along this journey and we're all there for like the same situation and same experience too like making memories and experiencing a different culture. And like learning along the way, like learning about a different culture. Yeah, so I think that really translated to when I was overseas. And yeah, I'm really glad I took that initiative to take that leap of faith too, especially. And I mean, I got so much opinions on my, what I was gonna do after high school and especially going out of like the norm of like not going to college right after high school. I got a lot of criticism, especially from family members too, about it. But I knew like within myself that I was doing the best thing for me and that, you only live one life and I think that you should experience all the things you want to experience in this life because you'd never know when a pandemic is going to hit! Previous Next

< Back Kaela's Story Kaela expresses how running has been a fundamental part of her life since she was younger but has really unfolded for her as she was in high school and college to something she really loves to do. Over the years, her relationship with running and the community she has formed with it has grown into something that holds a special place for her to continue wherever she ends up in the future. 00:00 / 04:16 I would say when I was very very young, I was always like there's there's these track races they'd have every Wednesday night in my town and I would go from when I was like two or three years old and it would just be like a bunch of really little kids just running down like the straightaway of the track and at the end you get a ribbon. The only reason I liked to go was because there's an ice cream truck there and at the end you would get like a little popsicle from the ice cream truck and I'd get a nice green participation ribbon and I had like a hundred of them cuz I never was anywhere close to the front but, that was kind of like my first introduction to running. When I was very little I continued to do those races throughout elementary school but it was never something that I really saw myself doing, it was just like a fun activity. Then when I was in middle school I had a friend who was like bugging me she's like “you got to come out and try this cross country thing like I know you're really going to like it” and I was being very stubborn about it and I was like “god I just don't think it's for me like it's just not my thing” and eventually I was like “fine I'll go to like the introductory meeting with you” and I want and I was like I left the meeting and already I was like “yeah I'm definitely going to do this” and throughout 2 years in middle school, I did it because I actually really enjoyed running. I liked competing, I thought it was a lot of fun I liked just getting better. I just like I just loved the feeling of running. The feeling of like going after school and just getting to be active. So that was kind of my first introduction to it and then I think as I got older and in high school and college I've definitely it's gone from a “oh this is something I really like to do” to like “wow this is something I love and this is like a sport that I love in a community that I love.” So that my relationship with it has gradually increased and gotten stronger over time. When I am running and when I am healthy and I am very grateful for it. I feel very grateful that I am able to because I've know how many times that I that I haven't been able to do that so it really makes the times when I'm healthy a lot lot special a lot more special. I think that I've learned a lot of resilience and patience from running and not the things we want aren't necessarily going to come to us right away and that things don't necessarily change overnight and it takes a lot of of patience and like dedication and a lot of wanting wanting something to happen to be able to make it happen. I tell you about that and a lot about having a purpose and wanting to. One thing I love about running is I know it is a very much lifelong sport and that there are so many opportunities to continue it once I leave college and get a job. I was so inspired I am able to continue it for as long as I can and hope that wherever I live in the future I'm able to find a new community of Runners and a new running group. I know that they're everywhere. I'm really happy that it is something that I know is going to stick with me for life. For me, I think running definitely has a special place. There's something about just like being able to feel like you're flying over the pavement and it just feels very freeing to me and definitely a place where I can clear my mind. Previous Next

< Back Talia's Story Talia talks to Charlie about her experience of studying abroad in Florence, Italy. She speaks about how she chose Florence as her host city. She tells us how studying abroad in Florence changed her and furthered her desire to travel the world. 00:00 / 02:22 What makes you want to travel? Well, I have spent, I spent that last 6 months abroad and so that was really amazing. I got to go through school. I lived in Florence. And that was one of the the best experiences of my life I think and because of that I feel like I learned a lot about different cultures and I was able to learn a lot about myself as well and I reallized that the environment that I am living in and the people I am surrounded by really can make my life better and I think that a lot of people would feel the same way and so I think that traveling is something that will always be important to me in those aspects. What took you to Italy? So I originally was thinking of going to Greece and so I wanted to go somewhere that was warm, somewhere with beaches. I thought that would be amazing then I realized that I have my ancestry is all from Italy and so I thought that it would be really interesting to learn more about where I came from and the culture that I’m from and so that was really important to me. That was part of my decision. I also have heard of how beautiful Italy is and Florence that was and I knew that it was a smaller city it was something that could feel more homey than other cities I think. I think that was something I was looking for especially if I was going to be living there for an extended amount of time. I wanted somewhere that I felt comfortable with I also had my two roommates going with me and we all kind of decided that the food would be the best in Italy and that was something that we really wanted yeah just a bunch of different things led me to go there Previous Next

< Back Sanjana's Story Sanjana discusses her relationship with her mother and how it has changed over time. She talks about her upbringing in an immigrant family, and how understanding those circumstances helped her understand her mother’s lived experiences, bringing them infinitely closer. 00:00 / 04:23 When I was a kid or, honestly, even farther back when my parents first got married, it was very, very traditional, very a very traditional sort of Indian people marriage. It was arranged. They didn't really know each other until they met for the first time, which was when they got engaged. My mom was twenty one. This was right before her 20 birthday, and I turned 22 recently. And so, we had this very interesting conversation. And so, she followed my dad's lead. And and a lot of people in my dad's family, she followed their lead because that was sort of the expectation that was had over there. And one thing to note about my dad's family is my dad is in a completely different generation from the rest of his siblings, and his siblings are a lot more socially conservative. They have different values than he does. And so, me pursuing medicine, for example, was something that my dad was all in about, and he's so excited about it. But his siblings are like, oh, but she's gonna be so old. When she gets out of school, like, when she gonna get married, when she, like, gonna have a family, like, my mother kinda had to go along with that when she herself had been raised in an extremely feminist household. And so, it was a culture shock for her, but she also felt that, you know, because of the social structures that surrounded her, she had to keep the peace. And so, when I was a kid, I was very rebellious, and I was very like, I I did not I always questioned a rule whenever it was placed before the end. So, my mom, because she enforced the rules that I didn't like, I often, you know, almost villainized her for a little bit. And I never really understood the dynamics of an immigrant family that's trying to like, it and it's not even like my dad espoused half of these values. It's just he wanted to keep the peace within his family too. And so, I never liked the fact that she did that, and that was always something that I thought was absurd. I was like, you don't even believe this. Why are you why are you enforcing it? Why are you making me do it? And that's the same thing with, like, education, and I'm always someone who believes that there should be a balance between fun and education. And for her, you know, as an immigrant, it's you know, your education is your only pathway to life in a country that's new. And so, you know, long story short, she always enforced things that I never believed in. It was something that I I you know, we fought about it, like, every day, so we were not close. Like, there were there are things in my life. Like, my first boyfriend, she did not know existed. And I'm looking back on it now. It would have been such a fun thing to talk to her about. It would have been such a great thing to talk to her about. And when it ended, it would have been so great to have her there, but I just didn't see her as someone who would support me back then. And then COVID happened, and we had to spend a lot more time together where I was sort of growing into an adult. I was growing into someone who started to make her own decisions based on, you know, what she believed in. And so, I, you know, sort of grew into my own a little bit, and I also got to see her as someone who's also living life for the first time. As I started to make, you know, my first set of, like, big mistakes, I realized that she, at, like, like, very close to the age I am now, moved to a completely different country and had almost no lifeline and was forced to sort of keep the peace and have that responsibility shouldered that that she did not need to have. But she was because of just the way that that Indian society worked back then. And Indian society followed her, like, all the way back all the way to The United States, and it it still follows her. And I also learned about what she believes in. I realized that she grew up in an extremely feminist household that, like, my grandmother left an abusive marriage and raised, like, kids all by herself. Her cousins were raised by a single mother. And so, a lot of that was very empowering my and so I began to appreciate her and the, you know, the behind the scenes work that she did for our family a lot more as I got to know her, and I started talking to her a lot more. And I realized we're way more similar than most people think. Before then, it would just be like, oh, you look like your mom. And I'd be like, I am nothing like my mom. But now when people say I'm like my mom, it is, like, the greatest compliment that I could ever receive because she is, like, the strongest, most steadfast human being I've ever known. She's been, like, the most unexpected lifeline for me. Really, really grown to appreciate the person that, you know, that she is, and that makes me just want to know her a lot more Previous Next

< Back Betty's Story Betty talks about her gratitude and appreciation for the support she has received during hard times in her life. 00:00 / 03:30 Previous Next

< Back Jessie's Story Jessie’s visit to an Ashram for her friend turned out to be a life-changing experience. She had witnessed what she described as golden filaments of light connecting people in a garden, which, when she came back home, made her feel alive, and she found herself drawn toward this community for several years. While still being a little skeptical, she learned to try and approach the most painful moments of life with love, which shifted her attitude, and she gives credit to this, making her a happier individual. Around this time, another eventful program, she experienced, Al-Anon, which is a twelve-step program which is for families of those struggling with alcohol addiction, which was the case with her then husband. This pushed her to untangle herself from codependency and understand herself for the first time. These two experiences together taught her essential lessons about letting things go that aren’t in her control and focusing on present things with good energy is what lightens the weight of being yourself. 00:00 / 04:33 Previous Next

McKenna's Story McKenna describes her love of gymnastics in this story. The lessons it taught her and the people she met along the way are invaluable to her, and she will carry these lessons with her throughout the rest of her life. Scroll to Listen McKenna's Story 00:00 / 03:21 McKenna: The reason that my mother put myself and my two younger siblings in gymnastics, um, was because my younger brother, who is three years younger than me, he always used to stand on his head in his car seat, um, like, as my mom would buckle everybody in. My siblings are twins, so getting everybody in the car was an ordeal because she didn't have enough hands to possibly buckle everyone in at once. And my brother would always slip on to his head in his booster seat and hold himself up there, and kind of swing around. And there were a couple close calls of him, you know, making some choices that maybe weren’t the safest for him. My mom put us into gymnastics, because she thought, you know, that this would be a safe place for them to learn how to be monkeys and not get hurt. Uh, and maybe not to put themselves in a headstand in the car seat. My brother, after - he did gymnastics only for a few years with us in the very beginning, and he quickly decided that that wasn't for him. And my mom for the most part was our chauffeur, here, there, and everywhere for gymnastics, um, although they both always made a point - sometimes, my sister and I had different meets, and we’d be in different places, so they would have to separate out for those meets. I think that, as I got older, a lot of my friends stopped doing it competitively, so I was - at one point I was like the oldest girl in the gym, other than one other girl who is a year younger than me by, like, a landslide. And, so. At that point in time - I don't know. I felt a little disconnected from my peers in that moment, but. Gymnastics is very physically demanding and, I mean, I dislocated my hip when I was thirteen and I tore some tendons in my ankle at 17. And there were days that I - there were 100% days where I was like, “Why am I doing this? Why am I here? I could be with my friends, I could be doing this,” whatever that could be might have been. “Why am I here?” and I think the life lesson from pushing through those days, and looking back on it now, the character I have for that, and the grit that I learned to say, “Okay, I made this commitment.” Some of my very greatest life lessons-and I constantly reflect back on things I learned from doing gymnastics-as like, you know, okay, back up and take a breather and we approach the situation as like, life skills as opposed to just physical sports skills. I learned a lot from gymnastics in the physical sense but most in the, like emotional and mental well-being and awareness sense. That I, I think I was ready to part ways. I felt like I had, I had learned what I could as a person. And sure, I could have kept going and learned new skills, and sure, I could have, if I really wanted to, have gone further with it but I just, I came to a point that I knew my body was not gonna be able to keep going. But, gymnastics was the first place that had an understanding that family could be more than just blood related. You come to college and you kind of have your home away from home or your home in a person more so than a place kind of thing and I learned that from gymnastics.

< Back Saddaf's Story Saddaf talks about the role religion played in her life growing up and now, discovering it for herself, she talks about how she struggles with it in college. She touches upon navigating two identities being a first-generation Pakistani Muslim American. Scroll to listen 00:00 / 04:57 Previous Next